garrison headcanons

a-zzurra:

because you know this bunch was the absolute worst at school

• random student: “oh man, keith
  is so mysterious and dreamy. i wonder what he’s thinking about…”
• keith
  internally: ‘if i drink the contents of this beaker will i be able to breathe fire’
• lance in tears: “pidge i’m gonna fail, i don’t know what to study for this test”
• pidge: “well i do. goodbye” 
• lance: “hunk you beautiful rule-breaking moth”
• lance: “hunk you cunning, pliable, chestnut-haired sunfish”
• lance: “hunk, you’re a genius! your brain is almost as perfect as your face”
• keith gets mad at a student so he just bites into their eraser and spits it across the room
• teacher!shiro emailing his students: ‘sorry guys class is cancelled today i couldn’t find a parking space so i cried in the lot for 8 minutes’ 
• pidge: “haha iverson left his facebook logged in let’s post a message saying ‘i’m a dick hurr durr’” lance: “hahah”
• hunk: “haha or we could send a 2000 word message to his wife explaining how he’s been having multiple affairs and he doesn’t love her anymore and their marriage has always been a sham”
• pidge: “…..dude….”
• hunk: “hahah just a suggestion ( :” 
• keith naruto-runs through the hallways 
• shiro: “hey guys today we’re gonna watch a video so i can sleep under my desk” 
• lance pointing at some birds on campus: “are those your relatives?” pidge: -__- 
• lance: “yuck there goes keith kogane…with the beautiful hair and the soulful eyes….he’s so disgusting i hate him” 
• keith: “sorry man can i pass through-” 
• lance: “can you pass-?! can you pass through??? can you- you burnt piece of celery…do you wanna go?!?! i don’t care, i’ll go right now, i’ll kiss you in the middle of the hallway!! i don’t give a shit i’ll do it!!!” keith: “what” 
• lance: “hunk i don’t feel so great, i messed up the flight simulator today” hunk: “:( i’m sorry buddy”
• hunk: “this is a quote that keeps me going when i feel down. ‘if we never flew, we would never fall. the life we live isn’t so simplistic, you just don’t get what you want. so we take what comes, and we keep on going’”
• lance: “woah hunk….who said that? obama?” 
• hunk: ”…..big time rush"
• shiro pointing at a board with the words ‘a lie’: “class, there is only one thing worse than a lie” 
• shiro ripping off a paper to reveal ‘living a lie’: “boom”
• keith gasping: “living”
• shiro: “no-”